juillet 22, 2024

Cours de rattrapage

Bonjour a toutes et tous,

Force est de constater que nous avons omis de vous reveler l’identite de notre nouveau Premier Ministre ou plutot, notre nouvelle Premier Ministre :-) : Julia Gillard !

Apres 17 jours de negociation, Julia l’a finalement emporte sur son compatriote Mister Budgie Smuggler, alias Tony Abott :

Comme vous pouvez le constate, ce fut serre, du quasiment jamais vu dans l’Histoire de l’Australie :

Passons maintenant a un sujet plus leger, la vision de l’outback du WA par un anglais expatrie, c’est un peu « capilo-tracte » mais tellement drole et pour tous ceux qui viennent nous voir entre Novembre et Mars, il vaut mieux etre averti :-) :

A Diary of a Pom In Karratha

August 31st
Just got transferred with work into our new home in Karratha, Western Australia, now this is a town that knows how to live!! Beautiful sunny days and warm balmy evenings.
What a place! I watched the sunset from a deck chair on the veranda. It was beautiful. I’ve finally found my my home. I love it here.

September 13th
Really heating up. Got to 35 today. Not a problem. Live in an air-conditioned home, drive an air-conditioned car. What a pleasure to see the sun everyday like this. I’m turning into a sun worshipper.

September 30th
ad the backyard landscaped with tropical plants today. Lots of palms and rocks. What a breeze to maintain. No more mowing lawn for me. Another scorcher today, but i love it here.

October 10th
This temperature hasn’t been below 35 all week. How do people get used to this kind of heat.
At least today it’s kind of windy though. But getting used to the heat is taking longer than I expected.

October 15th
Fell asleep by the pool. Got 3rd degree burns over 60{c3ef396c0895617fadf6f009537648bf2b8dbc0d51949cda7ca19c84c3827bd6} of my body. Missed 3 days of work. What a dumb thing to do. I learned my lesson though. Got to respect the ol’ sun in a climate like this.

October 20th
I missed Kitty (our cat) sneaking into the car when I left this morning. By the time i got to the hot car for lunch, Kitty had died and swollen up to the size of a shopping bag and stank up the $3,000 leather upholstery. I told the kids that she ran way. The car now smells like Wiskettes and cat sh1t. I learned my lesson though. No more pets in this heat.

October 25th
The wind sucks. It feels like a giant fxxking blow dryer!! And its hot as hell. The home air-conditioner is on the blink and the AC repairman charged $200 just to drive over and tell me he needed to order parts.

October 30th
Been sleeping outside by the pool for 3 nights now. Bloody $600,000 house and we can’t even go inside.
Why did I ever come here

November 4th
Its 38 degrees. Finally got the ol’ air-conditioner fixe today. It cost $1,500 and gets the temp down to 25, but the bloody humidity makes the house feel like its about 30. Stupid repairman.

I hate this stupid fxxkin place.

November 8th
If another wise arse cracks, « hot enough for you today » I’m going to fxxkin throttle him. Fxxkin heat!
By the time I get to work, the car’s radiator was boiling over, my clothes are soaking fukin wet, and I smell like baked cat!!

November 9th
Tried to run some messages agyer work. Worse shorts, and sat on the black leather seats in the ol’ car.
I though my fxxkin arse was on fire. I lost to layers of flesh and all the hair on the back of my legs and my fxxkin arse. Now my car smells like burnt hair, fried ass and baked cat.

November 10th
The weather report might aswell be a fxxkin recording. Hot and sunny. Hot and sunny. Hot and fukin sunny.
It’s been too hot to do anything for 2 damn months and the weatherman says it might really warm up next week. Doesn’t it ever rain in this damn fukin place? Water rationing will be next, so my $5,000 worth of palms just might dry up and bow into the fukin pool. Even the palms can’t live in this fxxkin heat.

November 14th
Welcome to HELL!!!! Temperature got to 41 today. Now the air-conditioner’s gone in my car.
The repairman came to fix i and said « hot enough for you today? »
My wife had to spend the $2,500 mortgage payment to bail my ass out of fail for assaulting the stupid fxxker. Fxxk Karratha! What kind of sick demented fukin idiot would want to live here?

December 1st
WHAT????? This is the first day of Summer??? You are fxxkin kiddin!!!

Voila pour le (mini) cours de rattrapage, a tres bientot !

Et pour les amateurs de photos, un autre billet arrive bientot :-) !

3 réflexions sur « Cours de rattrapage »

  1. coucou,
    ce billet, c’est pour nous décourager??
    Raté, nous serons là, au coeur de l’été….
    Faudra seulement nous fournir : Chapeau, crème avant, et après brulûres…et un peu d’ombre de temps à tems!!! voire la clim…
    bises à tous les 2, en attendant la vraie chaleur…

  2. ca serait marrant de lire diary of a aussie bushman in London!!
    Une question d’habitude!!
    Nous on l’a vecu sans la clim, ben en fait c’est pratique, pas besoin de chauffer l’eau pour faire le the!! Pour des anglais, c’est super convenient fait dire…

    Prochain billet sur la Melbourne Cup?

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